I touched on this briefly yesterday, but today I wanted to go into greater detail. I for one am tired of all the negative nellies misunderstanding what BP has done in Louisiana, and damnit, I’m gonna say my piece. All of you Johnny Bandwagon-Jumpers need to listen up, because I’m about to drop some knowledge.

First off, this is all a question of how you look at things. Yes, you can call it an environmental holocaust, but why do we always resort to terror buzzwords whenever businesses do anything? Remember New Coke? The public were practically screaming that it was made of clubbed seals and the rendered fat of war criminals, which admittedly is not far off the taste, but still very reactionary.

No, I prefer to think of this as BP opening up their business to a new customer base. And like many businesses, to drum up support they have offered their product or service free of charge in the beginning. When a new Starbucks opens up, you’re sure to see barristas in the neighborhood with free samples, and goodness knows crack dealers are notorious for their “first hit  free” marketing ploy.

If businesses as diverse as these can offer their product to new markets for free, then why can’t BP? All this time, animals have never been a revenue stream for the big oil producer, but who’s to say that animals don’t have a need for oil? In fact, oil is heavily used by animals for fur insulation and buoyancy. Perhaps the sea birds will evolve to use this material, saving them the energy of creating their own natural oils. Do not stand in the way of evolution, evolution always wins!

But you don’t hear anyone calling it Environmental Shareware, now, do you? No. Everyone just wants to leap aboard the witch-hunting train and cry about it without understanding the science behind it. Here are a few benefits to oil in the waters:

- Animals can conserve their own natural oils! (already mentioned)
- Easier fishing! Animals who can’t handle the oil will be found easily floating at the top of the water by predators
- Mechanization! Who knows what innovations nature will think up to make use of the oil? Do you? I didn’t think so!

So enough of your demonizing them, people! Let’s take a moment and thank BP for their selfless act of sharing.

Jim